ONLINE therapy ACROSS IlLinois, iowA & michigan
IN PERSON therapy IN CHICAGO
Couples Therapy
Helping couples move from the chaos of conflict to the calm of connection.
You both care. You both want things to be better. But you keep ending up in the same painful place—and you keep asking yourself, “should it be this hard.”
You’re having the same fight
over and over.
Maybe one of you pushes for answers, reassurance, or closeness… and the other gets defensive, shuts down, or pulls away. Maybe small issues turn into big blowups. Or maybe the conflict is quiet — but the distance or resentment feels loud.
Conversations stay surface level. Tension builds. You avoid certain topics because it’s not worth the fight. Even when you’re sitting right next to each other, it still feels lonely.
The more you try to “fix it” the way you solve problems everywhere else in life, the worse it can get — because what you need isn’t a better argument or a perfect set of talking points.
You need a different way to feel safe, heard, and connected again.
You’re Ready To…
Feel close again — like you’re actually on the same team
Start feeling like you can talk without it blowing up
Argue less… and recover faster when you do get into it
Feel understood instead of constantly explaining yourself or defending your intentions
Stop walking on eggshells and relax around each other again
Break the pattern that keeps hijacking your relationship even when you both mean well
Rebuild trust and closeness in the little moments — not just during the big talks
Handle hard stuff as a team instead of turning on each other
how i can help
Stop repeating the argument and start reaching the person.
In our work together, I use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a proven approach that helps couples move out of stuck patterns and back into connection. In EFT, we don’t necessarily focus on who’s right, handing out blame, or trying to “fix” your partner. The focus is understanding the cycle you get pulled into — what happens between you when stress hits, feelings get big, or someone starts to feel alone, rejected, or unsafe.
Most relationship pain isn’t coming from logistics. It’s coming from deeper places like: feeling under prioritized, feeling alone, feeling like you don’t matter, feeling like your partner isn’t there when you need them.
Those aren’t “problem-solving” issues, those are emotional safety issues.
We’ll slow down and look at real moments from your relationship so you can see what’s really underneath the conflict — what each of you is needing, and how you’re reaching for each other in ineffective ways. From there, I’ll help you practice new ways of responding that create more emotional safety, trust, and closeness.
Over time, you won’t just talk about communication — you’ll actually start to feel the difference: less reactivity, fewer blowups, faster repair, and a relationship that feels more connected, steady, and secure.
Common questions
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Couples sessions are a guided, structured conversation where we slow things down and focus on what’s actually happening between you in real moments. You’ll both have space to share your experience, and I’ll help you understand the pattern you’re stuck in and practice new ways of responding to each other. Most couples leave feeling clearer, calmer, and more hopeful about what to do next.
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Both are respected approaches, but they focus on different things. Gottman is often more skills-and-strategy focused (communication tools, conflict styles, building friendship and rituals). EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) focuses more on the emotional pattern underneath the conflict — the push/pull cycle, the moments you feel alone, rejected, misunderstood, or unsafe — and helps you create a deeper sense of security and connection, not just “better communication.”
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While I can’t make any guarantees, a good sign therapy can help is if you both want things to change (even if you’re not sure how), and you’re open to looking at the pattern you get stuck in — not just proving your point.
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That depends on what you’re working through and how stuck the pattern feels right now, but my goal is never to keep you in therapy forever. We’ll stay focused on real progress, and over time you should feel more clarity, more connection, and more confidence handling hard moments on your own — so you can “graduate” with a plan that actually sticks.
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You can still do meaningful work in individual therapy to understand your patterns, get grounded in what you need, and change how you show up in the relationship—often that individual work alone shifts the dynamic. If your partner becomes open to couples therapy later, I can make appropriate referrals to other couples therapists at that time.
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Contact me to schedule a free consultation with me so we can talk about what you’re dealing with and what you’re hoping will change. If it feels like a good fit, we’ll choose a first session time and I’ll walk you through the next steps from there.